Crazy Guy

Today I had yet another Botany test and I am not very confident about it. I'm praying for a C. Well, when I left the building, in the depths of despair over the test, I passed a man whom I'd not seen before and he was acting a little weird. As I walked away I could hear him yelling. I turned and saw him screaming like a mad man into his cell phone. He was doing that holding the phone down yelling insanely at the thing. I felt sorry for the person on the receiving end of the man's rage. I hurried away as quickly as possible to avoid being attacked by the crazy man. Even though I was a good distance away I could still hear him yelling, even over the water fountain. If I see him again, I'm running in the opposite direction. In other news, my fingers look like they'll be ok. My pinky doesn't even need a band-aid on it any more. My other finger still needs care though. I probably should have gotten stitches on it, but they'd have to put me under to do it and they'd have to give me laughing gas in order to sedate me, so I figure it'd cost way to much for a minor slash. I'll survive without a visit to the hospital. If my sister can do it so can I. I keep forgetting not to try to type with the tender finger so I better quit so I don't hurt myself any more.

Bleeding Fingers

My sister just got her first job at Hollywood Video a few weeks ago. Last Monday she sliced her finger with a razor blade. She probably should have gotten stitches but she's terribly afraid of hospitals and didn't go. Well the jinx has now been passed on. Today in Botany class about an hour ago I was holding a glass beaker while a guy filled it with water. The water came out too strong, the beaker slipped and somehow I sliced my ring finger and pinky. Yes we are talking pain, lots of pain. The guy was very apologetic and I was quickly given paper towels to stem the bleeding while my professor went to get me some band-aides. I really just wanted to cry it hurt so much. But I decided to play it cool since there were three guys around me asking me stupid questions like does it hurt and is it still bleeding. What do you think this is red paint? I wanted to yell. One guy advised that I suck on it. Yuck! And another wanted to take out his lighter and sterilize the wound. I told him that no one without a medical license was coming near me with heat or a sharp object. All I could think was "Great! The one non-science major person here today, and I'm the one who makes a stupid mistake." Thankfully the class was shorter than usual and I was able to go to my room and nurse my injury. Since writing this is making my fingers hurt, even though I'm not using them, I'm going to quit now and lay down in case I decide to faint.

The Gift

Today I went to my mailbox to see if I had any mail. Such as the video I bought from a guy on eBay, who assures me he sent it and that it's the U.S. Postal service who is at fault. I saw the weird orangy-yellow slip that they stick in your box when something is too big for the tiny cubby hole and got exited. It wasn't the video however, but it was still something awesome. It was a package from one of my very close friends. Inside was a Vanity Fair Magazine Special Collectors issue with Star Wars featured on the cover. I was thrilled. I hadn't even noticed it. I hurriedly got dressed for my aerobic dance class, morning the fact that I couldn't sit and read the article or stare at Mark Hamill for a few hours. (Wonder who my favorite character is.) Anyway, in the middle of class one of the girls next to me let me know I had something stuck to my butt. I looked and found a sticky strip of the envelope stuck to me. I wanted to crawl into a hole. I'd walked across campus with that stuck to me. How embarrassing! While I love the gift, it turned out to have a bad side-affect.

Valentine's Eve

So yesterday my mom and I got a crazy idea in our heads. We went to the mall for some mother/daughter time the day before Valentine's Day. I know, what were we thinking?! And of all the stores there, we picked Hallmark to shop in. Why? Because there were the best discount and clearance sales on the cutest things you could imagine. We bought about one hundred dollars or more worth of stuff for thirty-two dollars. I bought a precious fairy statue and a fairy candle holder. The store was filled with husbands and boyfriends franticly trying to get their significant other something for Valentine's. I spent some of my time just watching them. It was quite amusing. One guy spent ages at the card rack clearly looking for something for a girlfriend. He had the teddy-bear holding a Russell Stover's box of chocolates under one arm. I heard him ask one of the clerks if there were any cards that did not have 'love' in them. I had to laugh. Here was a guy that was super paranoid about the L-word. I mumbled to my mom as sarcastically as possible, "Wow what a great boyfriend! Wish I had that one." The poor unsuspecting lady will probably open the card today and say how sweet and thoughtful the guy was, not even noticing the lack of the terrible l-o-v-e. In actuality, all the dope had to do was watch TV for an hour in order to see the Hallmark commercial advertising the bears and say 'hmm I think I'll get that since the lady on the TV seems to like it.'
After that we did something even dumber. We went to Wal-Mart. Yes I think we do have a death wish or at least get a thrill out of near death experiences. As usual the Valentine's section was the picture of mass chaos and devastation. One lady picked up a box of kids valentines and an entire container of boxes came crashing down. Every time she picked some up they came crashing down again. She finally gave up. While we were walking to a register some kid sitting in a basket pointed at us and said 'haha' in that annoying, you want to smack them voice. At the same time my mom mumbled creep, while I mumbled stupid kid. What I really wanted to do was go bend that grimy little finger back until he cried and say 'haha'. We still don't know why he found two women going to a register so funny. Really I'm not a kid hater, there's just some you want to kill. Give me a kid who knows what 'no' means and I'll love it. Sadly, there are so few.
In conclusion; shopping the day before Valentine's is dangerous and aggravating, but can provide you with much amusement.

A Series of Unfortunate Events

Well, last night I went to take a shower. I got in and stepped on something. My instant instinct was to pull my foot up immediately. I didn't have my classes on, so I couldn't accurately figure out what it was. All I could tell was that it was oval shaped and black. I decided that it was a twisted up hair band from one of the other girls in the dorm and tried hard not to believe that it was a roach. As I have not seen one in the bathroom all year, I think there's a good chance it wasn't, but still...there's that lingering doubt that made me scrub the bottom of my foot really hard. Also, I bought a video off of eBay several weeks ago. I also bought the beautiful lamp that I've mentioned before. It arrived last week, but I am still without my video. If it doesn't arrive soon the seller is going to get a rather nasty feedback from me. It won't be pretty. Sure it's only five dollars, but theft is theft and he'll really hear about it if something doesn't happen soon. I've emailed him about it so I'll see what kind of an excuse I get. If I'm not satisfied that guy better look out. I failed my first botany test with a 64 and I'm worried my first lab wasn't the best either. No doubt I'll get it back today. I couldn't sleep well last night, which I blame mostly on the three hour nap I took about 4 in the afternoon yesterday to get rid of a headache. So this morning I am sleepy and my entire body aches. That's my lousy week of events. Nothing terribly exciting.

Hollywood Cesspool

I'm watching Columbo right now and I just have to say, I love that guy! He's so clever. I mean I know fully well that he has writers writing everything for him but it's just great. He acts like a bumbling, disorganized, fool to lure the criminal into a false sense of security and then strikes with some kind of a brilliant piece of evidence or dropping a stray hint at his plans to get the murderer to make a mistake. And if there's a celebrity in it, that's the criminal. It's so hard watching Robert Conrad (James West) as a bad guy. And while I'm on that can I just say that we have now reached the bottom of the cesspool in Hollywood. Expect a year of remakes and sequels. Fun, fun! Remakes of classic TV shows: Bewitched, I Dream of Jeanie, and The Honey Mooners, judging by the previews Jackie Gleason must be turning over in his grave. Movies: where to begin? War of the Worlds, the first time it's been remade says Hollywood, but I must protest. Are we forgetting a little thing called Independence Day? It's exactly the same. The only change: the aliens are killed with a man-made computer virus instead of a virus created by God that humans were immune to. If Spielberg keeps God in it I'd like to hug him. Boy will that throw leftist Hollywood. Sequels: Miss Congeniality, Mulan, Pirates of the Caribbean and who knows what else will come in the future. Why all of this remaking? Because Hollywood has run out of ideas and so has to remake movies that past brilliance has created, often times ruining the movie, and carrying movies made that do well into sequels, that also usually ruin the good thing they had. So Hollywood will have to wait for a bestselling book to come up that will make a good movie. Also after seeing Sergeant York last night, I have to say actors and actresses who do not have a southern accent should not attempt it. There's my soapbox on Hollywood. How I got here from a simple desire to praise the brilliance of Colombo, I'll never know.

Tuesday Night Discovery

I went to the store this evening and saw a guy with hair that looked like a mushroom on top of his head pulled way down over his eyes. I don't know how he saw to walk. I wanted to tell him to get a major hair cut. When I got home I started channel surfing and ran across something interesting on the animal channel. A florist in Australia not only sends flowers to the people you like, but she also sends cow dung in a lovely heart shaped box to those people you don't like. I thought it was a rather brilliant, cruel idea. Why can't we do that in America? It'd be another use for cow poop that farmers could capitalize on. Why not? Don't we all have at least one person we'd like to send a special gift like that to?